Had a great day yesterday with my garden Angels, so much of our garden has died over this last winter and when I looked at it, it was almost as if the garden has cancer too. Where to start ??? Keiran , Graham Dennis and I got to work and within a few hours we had made a great start clearing out the old dead plants and planning what to put in thier place. We were looking at the Pampas grass which were looking very drab and sorry for themselves, when we dicussed that setting fire to them was supposed to be the best way to get rid of the old plant and allow fresh new shoots to come through. We decided to give it a go and as soon as the flame touched the first plant it exploded into an inferno. I then saw something symbolic in this as I have 3 Pampas and 3 areas of concern in my breast, as soon as I mentioned it to Keiron he ran and set fire to the other two. We stood for a moment and watched the flames destroy the old plant and I thought of the 3 areas in my breast reacting to those cleansing flames, burning the old nasty cells and thereby allowing new growth in the coming months, I felt empowered.
Then I panicked as the garden filled with smoke and the plants collasped onto the grass around them which in turn started to ignite. I looked at the dry hedge behind them and expected any moment to lose that too.
This I recognised as my internal panic, not being able to control the forces of nature, that once you start a process you are not always able to predict the outcome. Then just as quickly as the plants ignited they started to dissolve into smouldering embers and become still. My panic subsided. I later realised that so much in life is unpredictable, but without starting the fire and taking the chance mankind would never have evolved from hunter gatherer. We would not be the people we are today.
Today I look out onto my cleared garden and have decided not to feel the loss and attachment but to look forward to the new growth, to plan and plant and watch nature begin anew. New beginnings- Very symbolic - dont you think ?? Off to the garden center to get some flowers .........